So before I headed out for lunch yesterday I pulled up a couple of fast food web sites on my computer to figure out what I was going to get. (Yes, I know I need to stop eating out and bring my lunch to work). I pulled up Chick fil A and thought to myself - I'm going to get the grilled chicken salad so I can get a cookie.
I entered the numbers onto the WW web site to find out how many points it was going to be. Nine. Just for the cookie. My heart sank as I stared at the screen.
I knew I wasn't going to get the cookie and that made me sad. I'm still sorting through these emotions and ups and downs of the beginning stages. I know if a few weeks the idea of getting a cookie at lunch won't even enter my mind, but in that moment I felt like I was being deprived.
Up until last week I had lost all control when it came to sweets. I was eating cookies and ice cream every day, sometimes multiple times a day. I think part of the push that finally got me to want to break that behavior was that Gracie was starting to ask for these treats everyday too. I was being a horrible example.
I would try and justify the cookies at lunch by saying I wasn't going to get fries with the chicken sandwich. I just laughed out loud when I wrote that. I was in such denial. Cookies, chicken sandwiches and diet sodas. When I was losing before that is not what my lunch looked like!
It's one thing to have a treat every once in awhile - when it's planned. But it was every single day.
So I still went to Chick fil A and I got the grilled chicken salad and it was filling and I didn't feel deprived from not getting the cookie. It's these little battles that are so important in the beginning before new behaviors become habits.