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If only ...

Here's a little story for you with a lesson that can be applied to weight loss ...

Last year I was going through a rough patch, I'm sure we all have these. I was a little down, felt like something was missing from my life, wanted to "be happier." I attributed it to missing my kids and feeling like I wasn't spending enough quality time with them. I really started to obsess over it. I kept thinking if only I could be a stay at home mom that would be the answer to all my problems.

Like I normally do, I went to Jim to talk about it. And like he does, he listened and was supportive. I told him about all the different solutions that I had come up with on how we could make it work for me to stay home. After I was done with my presentation he asked me what I really, really wanted. Well, there were a lot of little things that I wanted. I had dreams of picking the kids up from school every day, working on homework and then having the time to make a healthy meal every night that would be ready when Jim got home. I had dreams of a clean house - all the time. I had dreams of volunteering at school and church. But what it all came down to was more quality time with my kids.

And being the smart husband that he is, he told me that if that's what I really wanted that I could do that now. If I really wanted more time with the kids I could find a way to make it happen. And he was right. (He's always right- it's kind of annoying.)

He was right because I was wasting a lot of my time. When I picked up the kids from school and we would get home, Jacob would either read or play video games while Gracie watched TV and I did my own thing. I would be on Facebook or doing laundry or checking e-mail. On the weekends I would sleep in and if we weren't busy doing something I would just lie around the house and "relax."

If things like spending quality time with my kids, cooking and having a clean house were so important to me then I should have been using that extra time to make those things happen.

So when I really, honestly looked at what I was "down about" it didn't have anything to do with wishing I was a stay at home mom. That's not what I wanted. I love my career and I have no interest in giving it up. It was just one of those times when I was in a funk and felt like I needed to find something new that would make me happier. When really what I needed to do was look at what I was doing and seeing what improvements could be made.

So I did make some changes. I take the kids to the library every weekend and that is a really special time for us to spend together. I try and do a little laundry in the morning before anyone gets up. Recently I've started washing the kids uniforms on Sunday and having a whole week's worth ready to go before Monday. I volunteer with school and church when I can because it makes me happy.

So ... the tie in to weight loss? How many times have we said - if only it were easier! If only I had a personal trainer or a cook like celebrities have. If only I had more time to make it to the gym. If only I was skinny! If only I had the motivation. If only I had the discipline. Then I could lose weight.
Is that what you really, really want? To lose weight? Well, in the words of my husband, "if that's what you really want, you can do that now."

It's not about it being easier or having someone else help you. You have to make the changes necessary to get what it is you really want. No excuses - find the time to grocery shop and cook healthy meals, find a way to exercise whenever you can, find your motivation and discipline. Look at how you spend your time and find places that aren't a good use of your time and make those choices to get healthy.

P.S. - I went to Zumba last night when I hadn't planned to. Gracie has ballet on Wednesdays and it's tough to squeeze in Zumba before her class, but I did it anyway. Yay me!
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